Today was another morning of 3 major fits before school. The boy is taking 30mg of Prednisone a day. So I realize that is the cause, but oh my, I don't know how much longer I can do this. Somehow the, "I'm going to get your father" works. But if he's not here, we're in trouble. If I have no where to go (yeah, like that ever happens) it isn't a big deal, I just step over him and move on. But when we have somewhere to be, he needs to suck it up and let's go. That will be what my kids say to the counselor when they are in therapy as adults - "she was always rushing us to get in the car!"
So today on the way to work I was a mess. I just kept thinking of Gracie. She was so sweet and helpful this morning while the monster was at work. She never yelled at him (trust me, I did some yelling) or me. Yesterday, Dale was talking to them about baby Isabel Baxter and asked if they wanted a baby. They were talking about how Gracie wanted a girl and Grant wants a boy. Then Gracie said, "no, I really don't care if it is a boy or girl, so long as it doesn't have Histiocytosis." It broke my heart. I was in tears as I drove then when I got there, I sat in my car for about 10 minutes just sitting. I didn't want to go in, for some strange reason, no one was even there. I just didn't know what I needed. But I was pretty sure it wasn't talking about it. Every time I talk to someone, while I know they care, they just don't get it. I know they all think he's just a 4 year old having fits. Please tell me that this is more than that! I have had a four year old before, she never did this. And that child could throw some fits! These aren't your typical 4 year old fits.
But then I got to work and jumped in to the business at hand. Before I knew it I was better. I love my job and the people I work with so much. They didn't do anything special, but it is just great to be with them. Then I went to lunch with Kitty, Dale and Gretchen. What a treat! I haven't gone to "lunch with the ladies" since before I worked at the preschool. I came back to the preschool staff waiting on me to help set out the yard sale stuff. It was fun to dig through the junk with all these fun ladies.
I am so thankful for Tavada. She has taken over the preschool and is doing a great job. I really think I would have had a major meltdown in the last 2 weeks if it had been my responsibility. While I love those kids and teachers so much, I could not have handled one more thing lately.
Yesterday, Ashley shared with us the 8 things we can do to avoid burnout. I don't remember the words, but it was something about knowing where your "happy place" was. I wasn't sure what mine was. I found it today thanks to those that I love at work. I am so glad that after a morning of tears, that I was able to enjoy the day at work. Most people can't say that. Thank you!
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